The Sweet Soothing Sounds of Mac Powell.

Let's cut waaaaay back to say 2009.

I was not a fan of Third Day, the christian rock (country) band.
Mac Powell's voice made me cringe. I was told that this was not music. This was just noise.

Then as anyone who knows me or reads my blog knows. I moved in the insane house of the Reintjes family.
Now, first of all, they were WEIRD. 

I mean, these Christians really freaking loved God, like he was Bieber or something.

They weren't just Jesus Freaks, they were Jesus Lovers.

That was super freaking cool :)

When you live with someone, and move into a whole new families life, you learn the complexities of it. They weren't perfect, or completely logical, or angels of any sort. They had bumps and mishaps and sillyness, but the cool thing about this family was they really LOVED each other.

BUT. Back to the point of the blog. They LISTENED TO THIRD DAY ALL THE TIME.

This was not ok. I would wake up to Third Day, do school work to Third Day, eat to Third Day, brush teeth to Third Day. I would try to show the kids other music, and they liked a bit of it but it was NO Third Day.

Then the weirdest thing happened.

Somehow, the sound of Third Day was ok, it wasn't annoying, but it was just ok.

Then.. there would be days where I couldn't get the strength to move, and Third Day would come on and sing the words that God knew I needed to hear.

and now, with my family so far away from me, Third Day doesn't play as much in my house. But when I need to know that someone out there loves me, God finds a way to make Third Day play. My iTunes won't stop playing it, my phone will find it, the ipod will go there.

Then Mac sings, and I see the smiling kids, I see Koos making coffee and filling a hot water bottle, telling us a work story and getting the popcorn out. And there is Aubrey, sitting at her desk, blasting a freaking Third Day song, writing something down in her book, and telling me something I won't get until I need to, and helping me remember who I am in God.

I know Mac Powell was singing about God in the song Revelation, and I agree but I also think that when it comes the Reintjes,

"I've got nothing without you"

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEn74zP1glQ

I AM WHO I AM.

AND GOD LOVES ME.

BOOM.

Enjoy the quiet or go insane with the silence.

I'm fairly certain that my four walls are quite sick of hearing my voice. They seem to be thinking, "Oh come on! You were gone for like a month.... why did you come back?" However, they are great listeners. I find that living alone can always be a double edged sword. I do enjoy the space, I do enjoy being alone most of the time. However, ever once in a while, I think another human being would be nice company. I mean, if they don't mind the mess, the piles of electronics, the cups that never seem to stay clean (what is that even about?) and the fact that I always has music playing. That's not to much to ask I think!

I'm pretty lucky that God doesn't mind the mess. He just kinda hangs out with me as I sort through it all. He laughs at my jokes, he likes my cooking, but I'm sure he isn't a fan of the color of paint I picked..... nah I doubt he cares.

He probably does worry though about the food I eat and if I sleep to much, and he hopes I am taking care of myself.

I guess I am pretty lucky.



Hmm.... I need to get a piano.

Not Happy.

I'm not happy.

There I said it. I'm not depressed or anything, but I'm not happy.

I think that it's alright. That God can call us to do something for him and that it's gunna take hard work and it means that we have to really plug into him, but at that same time, it isn't all sunshine and rainbows.

Sometimes, it sucks, and it's hard, and it drags us away from the things we love the most, or the people we love, or the people who we think we could love but they..... anyways I digress.

Either way, I am in the north, my hometown, the one place that I thought I knew what happeness was. I have everything the world tells me I need. I have my family, and I have a job, and I am making money, and I have interent and TV and everything rich and worldy I could imagine.

I am unhappy.

Now don't get me wrong. I am grateful for every single thing I have recieved while I have been here. Seeing my family has been incredible, and they have been wonderful to me. I appreciate that I can work and make money when there are people who can't and I have the prillivage.

However, its the superfical, the thing I thought I needed, was stuff that I really really DON'T. 

I would trade this all up, for my little bedroom, in a little tiny house, with four tiny children, that love me more than I could have ever possible imagined. I would give up every second on my PS3 to hear Aubrey tell me that I missed the point, again. I would give up the constantt internet to hear Koos tell me that I am crazy... about something.

I suppose that the point here, was maybe God was trying to teach me a lession. A lession he tried to teach me, while I was happy, but like the silly human I am. I ignored him, and he sent me on a new mission. This mission I am not sure if I am doing well, or to his liking, but I continue to try.

As I continue to try and hear him, and let him speak to my heart, and do his will. Even though, I am unhappy, and would like just one more day to be happy, with nothing but my BC family and my little house in Duncan.

To God be the glory.
and may I learn more patience, as this is all he contines to tell me.